How to stop being jealous of an ex? How to learn to deal with jealousy?

There are no ideal relationships – this is a fact that you have to come to terms with and take, in a sense, philosophically. But it is in your power to work on the shortcomings, and today we will talk about such a common problem as the presence of jealousy for your partner's ex-girlfriend or wife.

How to stop being jealous of an ex?

1. Keep yourself busy. The most effective method to help you stop being jealous of your ex is to distract yourself. Someone goes on a spree, others plunge headlong into their favorite hobby, more practical women completely devote themselves to work. In fact, the busier you are, the less time and resources you will have for unnecessary thoughts. And yet – this is a great way to become even more interesting for your man, because men love passionate women, with burning eyes, and not those who are endlessly busy with reflection and unnecessary jealousy.
2. Pay attention to how often your boyfriend communicates with his ex. Pay attention to different details. How much time does he spend with her? How often do they call or text each other? Perhaps your beloved has not remembered her for years – and you worry in vain. In fact, it is very important to understand the nature of this kind of jealousy. If your boyfriend / husband did not give any reasons at all, then you should drive such thoughts away from yourself. If there is no smoke without fire, then it is worth fighting not with the symptoms, but with the cause.
3. Watch their communication. Find a reason to invite her to visit you or meet in a cafe, you can think of any other joint event. By the way your boyfriend will communicate with his ex, you can accurately determine the nature of his relationship: it is quite possible that you really have nothing to worry about at all.
4. Befriend his ex. Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer. Try talking to his ex if you can. Having met and made friends with her, you will not only learn about the degree of your boyfriend's passion for a rival, but also learn a lot of interesting things about him. It is possible that you will learn more about his preferences, and indeed: tell me who your ex is, and I will tell you who you are.
5. Identify the qualities that your boyfriend liked in your ex and develop them in yourself. It is clear that if he is with you now, then he likes you much more than the former, and it does not matter for what reasons they broke up. It is not necessary that you excel your opponent in these qualities. It is possible that your jealousy is due only to a slight envy of more magnificent forms or her culinary skills. It doesn't matter – sign up for a gym and get a cookbook.
6. Don't deny your feelings. You are a living person and you also have the right to negative emotions. This is part of life. You don’t need to do auto-training, they say, “I’m not at all jealous." Realize and reflect on this feeling, try to understand on what basis it appeared. you will reflect this feeling, you will immediately calm down.
7. Realize your advantage over her. First, your man is now with you, not with her. Secondly, find your objective advantages, what you are definitely better at. Perhaps you have a much prettier figure, a better education, a more interesting job, longer eyelashes, or skinnier legs. These facts will help you feel more confident and get rid of the nasty pricks of jealousy.
8. Talk frankly with your partner. This must be done very carefully: in no case do not read their correspondence, do not go into his phone. Just be honest and candid about your feelings. If you are dear to your man, then most likely it is he who will find exhaustive arguments that will help you get rid of unpleasant feelings.